...

sorry. im going back on what i said. but i just cant hold it in any longer.

this blog wont be a happy one. stop here if you expected a happy blog.

i cant believe. they say they have "proof", but i can "prove" to them that i really haven't. gosh. they think they can just throw it at me like that. but in truth, they dont know anything that happens in my life. well...not all of it. only i do. GOSH! i dont get to say ANYTHING! mainly because they are my senpai. i respect them. of course i do. but they cant trust me anymore. wow thanks. and i love you too.

i know ive made the same mistake again and again. and i only blame myself. i only took the chance this time because i thought that i may lose it. but i probabaly killed the chance. i wont be making that mistake in a long time. i know youre mad at me, not cuz i am who i am, but because of what i did...right? and everyone is. but i let it go. i wouldve held on. but i let go because i know that youre right, and that i know that i dont want to hurt you.

ive hurt you hundreds of times. and i am sorry. i will not be forgiven. but...i cant do anything now. i wont pursue this matter, cuz im scared and i wont hurt you and my friends anymore. ive done enough.

so...you say we are better apart. i understood what you meant. but im thinking...is your explanation the truth?? cuz i have so much evidence that could prove you wrong. i feel so angry with the 3 of you guys. but its inappropriate to show it. its so childish. i wont show it. but if ppl keep on pushing me, i will lose my self control. good luck.

argh! sorry for the rather pissy and depressed blog. i will continue to write good blogs soon.

love kyexx